So
this is a topic that has lingered on my mind for quite some time. Through past
and present experience, I have come to terms that yes the concept of friendship
is vastly different in each and every person’s mind. Maybe (again) I read into
things way too much, but these are observations I’ve made and I can’t help but
pen it all down. So here’s my rant…
(Disclaimer): Again, these are purely my thoughts and
opinions. In no way am I trying to preach or force my opinions onto you. Your
choice if you wanna take it that way!
The
first point happens to be joking around and teasing. Yeah, I get that. Everyone
wants to goof off with friends every now and then. But there’s always a limit,
which people in my college never seem to get! I mean, I still remember when I
first came to college, everyone thought it was hilarious that I wouldn’t share
my drinking water, or anything else for that matter, with others. Then came the
jokes of how weird I was to pop out my hand sanitizer to cleanse my hands
(DUH). I used to get a bit offended and sometimes clueless as to how to
respond, because at times it’s almost as if they’re putting you down rather
than just joking. I’m not used to to being ganged up by everyone, and be taken
as some hilarious joke. Now, I fire back at them (jokingly of course), because
that seems to be the only way to handle it. I’m surprised they haven’t made fun
of my accent as much.
Second,
misunderstandings through silence. Ok, I have never in the past had any
arguments or problems with any of my friends, who were all mainly girls. Until
I came here…Boy oh boy…. do girls like to gossip here!!! People tell me oh
that’s normal…all girls are like that. I say NO WAY. I have lived abroad and
never once did I face ANY kind of drama with my girlfriends. I think it may
partially be because people goof around so much so that they forget how to
handle serious situations sometimes. I’m straightforward and tell that person
to their face. Unfortunately, people here would rather go behind my back and
try to “solve” the problem with someone else. That’s how misunderstandings
rise! I mean, just the other day I didn’t like something a friend did so I told
her directly. Because I hadn’t just kept my mouth shut, the next day she
started acting a bit strange. What starts as a day of silence turns into the
eternal silent treatment. Like, WHAT?! If you got problems with me, TALK IT
OUT. It’s that simple.
The
third point is honestly just dumb to me. I’m generally a very friendly person,
and love interacting with all kinds of people. Then there are my so-called
friends who get offended or insecure every time I start chatting up with
someone other than them! I mean, it’s my life. I would like to talk to whoever
I want, and whoever I’m comfortable with. Doesn’t mean you have to give me the ‘eye’
and start whispering every time I meet somebody! God, why is our college so
dang cliquish?! I do not like to hang with just one group of people. In fact,
everyone was so ‘uber’ friendly with me on my first few days of this college.
The minute I started interacting with everyone, slowly all these people stopped
talking to me. Now, they barely glance over or say hi. You don’t have to just
limit yourself to certain people, you know. The whole fun in life (for me at
least) is getting to meet all kinds of people SO DO THAT.
My
point is, friendship should not just be about temporarily hanging around with a
person, goofing off, and then just forgetting all about them when it comes to
the real stuff. Then, there’s the whole thing about letting your ego get the
best of you, but that’s a whole another story. Will get to that another day. I
have been and always will be a very good friend, unless you treat me like crap.
It’s like what they say, you give respect, you get it. Friendship is all about
that, but it’s also about understanding, honesty, and genuine love which creates
that strong ever-lasting bond.
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